Who's harder to raise?

If any of you get Parenting magazine then you've probably already seen this article. It's on pg. 102 of the June 2008 issue. For those of you who haven't take this quiz to see if you know if a boy or girl is harder to raise.



1. Who's harder to discipline?

2. Who's harder to keep physically safe?

3. Who has a harder time learning to communicate?

4. Who has a harder time building their self-esteem?

5. Who's harder to get to do school work?



Being a mom of three boys I got just about every question right. It also helped me realize that my boys are pretty normal...so here are the answers to each question and a brief explanation of why.

1. Boys are harder to discipline. '..their hearing is not as good as girls' right from birth, and this difference only gets greater as kids get older. Girls' hearing is more sensitive in the frequency range critical to speech discrimination, and the verbal centers in their brains develop more quickly. A girl is more likely to respond better to discipline strategies such as praise or warnings. "Boys may need to be picked up and plunked in a time-out chair," Michael Gurian says. 5 boys for every 1 girl are diagnosed with a "disorder" (bipolar, hyperactivity, ADD, etc.) Some kids-most often boys-may simply fall on the more robust end of normal. They need more opportunities to expend energy and aggression, as well as firmer limits.'

yet another reason I try to let my kids outside as much as possible. It explains why if they sit in front of the tv all day/afternoon they don't go to sleep as easily- compared to when they've been playing outdoors or with their toys.

2. Boys are harder to keep safe. 'In general, boys are more rambunctious and aggressive, experts say. Taking risks lights up the pleasure center of their brains. But letting kids explore-at the cost of a few scrapes and cuts-builds character, self-confidence, resilience, and self-reliance, says Wendy Mogel, Ph.D. Boys, being natural risk takers may need encouragement to slow down a little, but maybe girls need to be encouraged to take more risks.

3. 'Boys, then girls are slower at communication. From birth girls tend to be more interested in colors and textures, while boys are drawn to movement, like a whirling mobile. Boys not only learn to talk later than girls and use more limited vocabularies, they also have more trouble connecting feelings with words. Important note: because boys hold eye contact for shorter periods than girls, parents may worry about autism, since this can be a red flag. "It's a relief for moms to know that this is normal and comes from the way the brains are set up," Gurian says.' As girls get about 8 things can get harder. The flip side of being so adept at communicating is that girls exert a lot of energy on it. There can be a lot of drama around who's mad at who, etc. '

good to know, esp. since Austin doesn't say the 10 words that the pediatrician suggests he should by 18 months. I've learned that he'll talk when he's ready

4. Even at a young age 'girls have a low self-esteem. Girls tend to put others needs first. Helpfulness and nurturing are virtues for everybody. But this tendency in girls makes it smart to help her explore and strengthen her inner nature and encourage her to try new things. Be awaer of the messages you convey about your own body, diet, and exercise.'

5. 'Boys and modern education are not an idyllic match. In their early years, most boys lag behind girls in developing attentiveness, self-control, and language and fine motor skills. The relatively recent acceleration of the pre-K and kindergarten curricula has occurred without awareness that the brain develops at different sequences in girls and boys. Music, clay work, finger painting, and physical exercise-early-ed activites that once helped lively kids acclimate to school-are vanishing. The key is for parents to present both boys and girls with plenty of no-pressure opportunities to try out the areas that are challenging.'

I can tell you that the physical activity in schools is a lot less than what we got growing up and it's frustrating as a parent. Colin only gets P.E. 3 times a week and as long as it's not muddy (although there's a huge blacktop area to play on) they get 20 minutes of recess a day. It's pathetic that my child has to be in the classroom so much that he comes home just about to burst and beyond moody. Doing an hour of homework (mostly reading) doesn't help either. Don't get me wrong. Colin is advanced in his reading so he has more difficult books to read. I just wish they could give them a bit more physical activity during the day. I'm sure not going to keep them home-I would not handle homeschool well at all!!! kuddos to moms that do!

So, to sum it up boys are more of a handful early on, (like you had to tell ME that) and girls more challenging beginning in the preteen years.